Current mood:	chipper
Entry tags:	space lizard team is go

V: Glenn Beck's Science Fiction Wet Dream Come True
OK, so I watched the pilot episode of the remake of V: The Mini-Series.

Point the first:



V starts off by attempting to copy the success of another reboot of a cheesy dated science fiction series by going the Battlestar Galactica route("anybody can be a Visitor!") using the aliens ability to blend in with the rest of us as a way to create tension! Of course they forgot the whole 'writing, character, plot' thing that made that element work in BSG. Instead V's storyline deals with the aliens hiding in positions of power for centuries sowing discontent, which sounds a lot like it was inspired by the conspiracy theories of David Icke, who believes everybody in positions of power are secretly related to space reptiles here to eat us, a concept he clearly stole from the original V mini-series. So yes, the new V series is copying BSG using a conspiracy theory that's derivative of the original V series.



And then we have the subtext. V is an hour long, completely insane comparison between the Visitors and the Obama Administration, as seen through the eyes of Glenn Beck. In fact there should probably be a subtitle appearing periodically at the bottom of the screen informing the viewer that 'This is what Glenn Beck Actually Believes'. The show spends most of its ending minutes hammering its message through your face with a giant wooden club when the leader of the aliens (naturally a Super-Model) explains to the human reporter that the Visitors are going to open up centers to deal with the sick in every single city across the globe and cure millions of people with cancer and disabilities for free.

Naturally the reporter, thinking about how all those poor insurance companies will lose profits, looks aghast:

"Do you mean it will be like....UNIVERSAL HEALTHCARE?!"

The Diabolical Space Woman looks at him with a sense of emotionless, alien, evil, that can only be found in the heart of a socialist.

"Uh-yeah."

BUM-BUM-BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!



This is not helped by the fact that V's writing makes the cut scenes in Resident Evil 5 look like Iris Murdoch's "The Sea, The Sea".

For example, a son takes a free ride onto a V mothership, meets a hot alien girl, is indoctrinated into the Visitor-Perspective and begins painting "V" graffiti on walls, which gets him scolded by his mother (who is also an FBI agent)

"Why are you doing this?" she asks "Is it because your father left us?"



All this and religion too!

We have a hero who's a bible-thumping fanatic who doubts the aliens because (get this), the Bible says they can't be real!!

He's the tough-as-nails, action-movie version of Reverend Fred Phelps; discriminating against an entire species, just because the bible sez so!

And we're seriously suppose to side with this guy; and he's the freaking romantic lead to boot!

GAH!

V reminds me of Independence Day, not just because the opening is clearly a homage to ID4 (so much so that they namedrop it), but because I find myself hoping that the aliens win.

Go team Space Lizard!